Olympic Trials Weekend Recap

17 Jan

I’d like to point one thing out- With promising to post 3 blogs a week, not all of my posts are going to be “brilliant”. Quantity might replace Quality a bit. But there will definitely be pieces I spend a lot more energy on tonight.  Also, my most popular posts are the ones that are mean. So..I guess I’ll have to be mean more often.

EDIT: Writers on the LetsRun site, from time to time you feature a link to my blog on your front page and thats awesome I love it, it brings in 1000’s of visitors! But from time to time there’s posts, like this, where I ruffle some feathers talking about religion. I’d rather this post not be put on LR, if you were to ever consider it. Everything else is cool though go for it when ya like a post! And if ya’d ever like to contact me, ornelas@umich.edu is the place to do it!

Also, I don’t intend to stop saying “Swag” yet. If you don’t like it, that’s cool. Go read RunnersWorld and learn how to train for your first marathon in an easy 6 week plan!

Without further adieu, here is a recap of those who Swagged the Eff out at the Olympic Trials Marathon this weekend, and a recap of those who failed to impress me/us.


American Flag, Neon Sketchers, Winning = SWAG AS F**K

A.) Meb is 36 years old.

B.) He races in Sketchers.

C.) He’s not in everybody’s face about how awesome God is.

D.) He made another Olympic Team at 36 YEARS OLD!

What’s not to like about Meb? He’s not cocky, he’s been a major player in our sport for a long time, and the guy has been producing solid results year in and year out.  Maybe he wasn’t the race favorite, but he proved to us he should have been.


I admit it....I'd wear these.

Ok, I realize I made fun of Skechers in an earlier post. Mainly because velcro shoes and Shape-Ups are a fashion disaster and you should be punished for wearing them.  But The GOrun shoes Meb has been rocking…well….He has me sold. Along with confirmation that they are very comfy from a friend at UT who has a pair, and Meb’s success in them, I’m convinced they can’t be half bad. There. I said it.


Click on Pic above to get full text. I have a feeling God also loves Brady more than Tebow.

Ryan Hall is the Tim Tebow of our sport.  Yeah he’s good at what he does but the whole fact that “God” is his coach and that he resembles the token super religious kid that I assume almost all of you have encountered on your cross country team at some point.  You know, the one that made you feel bad about hooking up with that totally hot Tri-Delt the night before? The one who tried to convince you a trip to FCA would be more fun than playing Skyrim all night?  I wish more star athletes were Satanists, it’d be much more fun to interview them. “Yeah, I sacrifice a goat before each race and rub the blood on me. It’s really relaxing. Hail Satan!”


A face only a deity could love.

As much as I’d like to make fun of this guy for a whole blog post, he made the Olympic Marathon team for a second time in a row. Which is more than I, or anybody reading this blog, has ever done.  So for that, a tip of the hat to you, sir.


The Black Cactus.



Flotrack >

No live coverage? FOR AN OLYMPIC QUALIFYING EVENT?  Thankfully Twitter was on fire during the trials and made it easy to follow the marathon online.  Still, not the same…



Shalane is a beast. If anybody thought she wouldn’t win, well, they were probably the same people who voted for Bush the second time.  She’s still good looking too, nice job bb.  (still luv u Kara)


How I felt when he finished too 😦

I’m a Ritz fan, I wanted him to win. But, dude, half tights in a marathon? What the hell? That’s why you didn’t make the team.  Thats why. Facepalm.

Until next time…EAT, RUN, SWAG.


17 Responses to “Olympic Trials Weekend Recap”

  1. VanessaG January 17, 2012 at 1:10 am #

    wow! I can’t believe you just wrote all that! I am soooo in disagreement with you. I mean I enjoy reading your blog, but I can’t believe you would “down” someone for taking a stand for Christ. It is from HIM ALL blessings flow and it is from him that Ryan Hall, Tim TEBOW(greatest guy EVER!!) and any other athlete has the ability to do it. I think we need more Tebow, more Ryan Hall’s for our nation and kids to look up to. I get so sick of people looking up to Lady Gaga…what good is she doing? Tebow, Ryan and other men are using their talents for the Lord. I can promise you this: if you do put your faith (and running) included you will be a better runner. Try it and see. 🙂 sorry to rant, I just can’t keep my mouth shut when people don’t give the glory to the one it should.

    • Andrew January 17, 2012 at 1:41 am #

      And I get sick of people like you who can only think and talk about god. It’s great that you believe in him and all, really, I have a lot of respect for you people that can actually believe in something so ridiculous as religion. But no one wants to hear about how much you love him and how great he is. And you ask what Lady Gaga is good for? She breaks the social norm and shows that its okay not to be the same as everyone. That if you’re LGBT you’re not an outcast or “defective,” it’s about being confident in yourself. Sorry to rant, I just can’t keep my mouth shut when people give glory to the something as silly as god and say thats the only reason they can actually do something.

      • eatrunswag January 17, 2012 at 1:54 am #

        Everything that Andrew just said. Thanks for saying it for me man!

        Look I’m totally ok with people being religious! But it’s annoying when A.) people are totally in other peoples faces about it (LEAVE ME ALONE.) and B.) When people claim that the only way you can accomplish is through God.

        I mean no disrespect to any religious readers (I actually assume the vast majority of my readers are religious), I believe anybody should be able to be religious or non-religious and not fight (or kill) each other over it. The main thing is to live a good life, whether that requires you to be religious to do so or not, it is in living a good life that counts.

        Why do people always point to Lady Gaga?? She has given thousands, maybe even millions, of gays confidence to be proud of who they are. Something religion fails to do.

        Hope everybody keeps reading ❤

      • Anoneymouse Cowheard January 17, 2012 at 2:08 am #

        Im sorry you dont believe in religion. It is quite unfortunate. In the days of Jesus Christ, people were killed for their beliefs, and now if they reveal their beliefs on national tv they are ridiculed (not as bad as being killed but still not good). People should look up to celebrities but a lot of people idolize them and out God is a jealous God.

  2. Anoneymouse Cowheard January 17, 2012 at 1:24 am #

    I wonder why Shalane Flanagan has her first name instead of last name on bib.
    I love how Abdi has a closet full of J’s. Truthfully tho, what black man doesn’t have a closet full of J’s? Meb be killin dem in da sketchers. Ryan Hall is..Hyan Rall.

    Great Blog today

    Sorry for such harsh criticism yesterday, ❤

    –to God the glory

    • eatrunswag January 17, 2012 at 1:49 am #

      I like harsh criticism, it fuels me to make better posts, so keep letting me know when my posts are horse shit ❤

  3. Mom January 17, 2012 at 1:41 am #

    I have to agree – somewhat – with Vanessa. I think it takes a lot of guts for these young men in the spotlight to spread their faith. Try to remember some of what you learned in Sunday school.

  4. ron warhurst January 17, 2012 at 1:52 am #

    how did the dual go??

    • eatrunswag January 17, 2012 at 1:57 am #

      If this really is Coach Ron,
      It went pretty well! We went through the mile in about 4:43 (way too slow for my comfort) and I knew I had to drop the other 2 OSU guys and focus on trying to run away from Adam Green, an 8:45 steepler. At the mile mark I took off and tried to run away. I made it a real race. Closed in 4:21 for the last mile, but Green still got me by 2 secs, and a teammate of mine passed me in the final strides of the race. I’m happy with an 8:32 3k on our super slow track going out in 4:43 in January!

  5. catewestenhover January 17, 2012 at 2:23 am #

    I’m a Christian and I agree with a lot of what Hall says – I believe God enables me to run also. How else do you think people are talented? They just get lucky? Hard work gets you in shape, but so many people work hard and only a few are successful.

    I guess how you feel about that, who has talent and who succeeds, depends on your belief in how much God influences sporting events/ athletes. Does God care if Ryan Hall wins? I’m not sure. I think he cares that Ryan gives him his best effort.

    As for me, I’d rather believe God has a plan and purpose for my running, rather than me just doing it because I like it. Running would be pointless otherwise – what am I really accomplishing?

    And please let us know when you find a Satanist runner. That WOULD be entertaining.

    • eatrunswag January 17, 2012 at 2:49 am #

      First off I like this response. I am totally ok with people having that belief and running for God. Is it my belief? Not exactly. Is there a “right” belief? Can’t be proven, so the point I’ve been trying to make in the comments relating to religion is I like that we can all have our own beliefs. Many run for God, which is great. I run for 3 main reasons- because it lets me really get to know myself through testing my mental and physical limits, I have a high anxiety disorder and it does wonders to relieve my anxiety without any pills, and thirdly for my family who I can bring great joy to with my running successes. I chose to pick on Ryan Hall because A.) I was looking for something funny and offensive for this post (found it!) and B.) I wish there were more intense/marketable athletes at the head of our sport like the athletes that are world famous in the NBA and NFL. They are going to help get us the credit our sport deserves in the media. Ryan Hall is not. Just my opinion though!

      Secondly-I hope I’m not coming off to everybody who reads this post as more of an ass than I was trying to be. I think it should be remembered that I write SATIRE POSTS. Every time I start writing politically correct posts I get complaints. These posts that people disagree with stimulate more interesting conversations and I am guilty in that I like getting a rise out of people from time to time 😉

      As for a satanist runner, well I’ll be on the lookout. Do Satanists even exist anymore? I can’t think of a single reason somebody would want to be a Satanist but I’m sure there are plenty out there. One of them might run, although I’m not sure they’d be very fit from living in their mother’s basements and their other poor lifestyle choices.

      Lastly- I like getting comments on posts! I’m finding as I write more, getting responses means I must have done something right, whether that’s pleasing my audience or even better stimulating a nice debate with my audience!

    • The Jesus January 17, 2012 at 3:01 am #

      How do you think kids in Africa are starving? Are they just unlucky?

    • LEBOWSKI January 17, 2012 at 3:09 am #

      If what you say is true, then God (if there is such a thing) has chosen favorites. I have seen some of the most faithful people, who have an absolute passion for running, work hard only to be mediocre. and oppositely I have seen people with no faith in any religion go to compete at very high levels. Why should someone who is running for themselves be “given” this talent? well its because of the genes that were passed on from their parents during their conception that gave them more efficient cardiovascular or muscular systems. (oh and they work hard). and if you feel that God is the reason that you run, then go you! but what am I accomplishing by running? I’m testing the limits of my ability, meeting some of the best teammates/friends one could ever ask for, and having FUN- none of which are influenced by my religious beliefs. (which if you couldn’t guess, don’t exist).

  6. ari January 17, 2012 at 6:16 am #

    Maxim needs to call up Davila, Shalane, and Kara ASAP and be like “YOU CAN BE FAST AND NOT BE ANOREXIC”. I have my own hidden agenda for wanting this, but that’s what they should advertise.

    Also sacrificing goats ain’t a bad idea. It can be like the girls who are all “I can’t climax without sharp things… tee hee!” except I would use my newfound powers for pure evil, which is making someone look like a bitch in front of all their fans. Racing with a cigarette? You fucking got it; I’ll put it out on some dude as I pass him. Eyepatch? Depth perception is for pussies.

    But let’s get back to the main point: Meb. Meb is my homeboy. Meb makes my penis tingle. Meb is a product of American distance running. I love me some Lagat just as much as any other ketchup-loving american should, but Lagat broke my heart the day I found out he only became an American in recent history. Ryan Hall is legit too, and I hope he gets involved with some scandal that makes him separate from his wife so that I can be there for the rebound. But hopefully it’s a scandal that keeps him running, though really, Sarah Hall’s sexiness > Ryan Hall’s running.

    peace out boy scout. as always, fuck NBC

  7. on the internet too much guy January 17, 2012 at 10:19 pm #

    eh???? http://sopastrike.com/

  8. on the internet too much guy January 17, 2012 at 10:23 pm #

    oh, and separation of church and sport is good

  9. site June 2, 2012 at 10:24 am #

    When I at first left a comment I clicked on the Notify me when new comments are added checkbox and now each time a remark is added I receive 4 email messages with the identical comment.

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