Maybe this post comes off as harsh because I had an incredibly disappointing race this past weekend.
Or maybe it comes off as harsh because there’s no other way to talk about the American Record holder for the mile failing to run times that would be in the top 5 for either event IN HIGH SCHOOL. Not Swag, not swag at all.
So, Alan, PLEASE. Do us all a favor, RETIRE.
There are some major benefits to retiring! In case you haven’t thought about it yet, here’s some things you might not have thought about yet!
Because once retired, it becomes acceptable to talk about your glory days.
Getting that “Perfect” Lawn
You Can Take Part in Much Less Stressful Games/Hobbies!
You can become a mentor for youngsters!
You will be able to indulge in the finer things in life!
It will be socially acceptable for you to drive as slow as you’ve been running!
Seriously man, I’d come within 5 seconds of you, if not beat you, in a 1500 right now. And I’m a terrible miler. Just hang the spikes up, go knock some things off the bucket list!
Until next time,