Archive | June, 2012

Dear Galen Rupp: You’re Welcome.

30 Jun

OK, now I know that the post that essentially made my blog well known was this post about Galen that I did shortly after the US champs last summer: http://eatrunswag.com/2011/06/24/the-infamous-galen-rupp/   but now I can safely say that Rupp has redeemed himself (to me at least)

 

Pre-2012 Galen Rupp was pretty ridiculous.  Although he ran some pretty damn impressive times and races, he donned that ridiculous Hannibal Lector mask, effeminately posed on starting lines, and found many of the races in the US to not be “Rupp Certified”

Never Forget.

 

2012 Rupp, however, was a completely different person.  I think “The Boy Who Wouldn’t Grow Up” finally decided to leave Neverland

Good, don’t go back, I like the new you bb

 

And I take full credit for this.

 

Now I know that elite Nike athletes have most likely never heard of my blog as they justifiably have better things to be doing with their time.  But I’m going to assume confidently that Galen read my blog postings about him, was embarrassed, went into a bout of depression, started eating an all raw meat and thyroid medication diet and became a man. 

 

Examples of the transformation below:

From this

 

To this.

 

From this

 

To this (much better.)

 

“Ew, boobs”- Pre 2012 Rupp

 

“Got the hottest chick in the game, wearing my chain”- Post 2012 Rupp. 

And finally, from this

 

to this.

 

Does Rupp have a realistic shot at medaling at the London Olympics? Maybe. We’ll see.  But I’ll be rooting for him.

 

Some quick stuff:

First- Please click this web site and vote, it takes all of 5 seconds, for “Run CB”, a running store in Crested Butte, CO, to get a huge grant!  Click the link, login w/fbook, search “Run CB” and just click vote.

https://www.missionsmallbusiness.com/

 

Second- I’m going to do a big trials recap when it is over, that comes in the next post!

 

Third- I’m now in Flagstaff for about 6 weeks to finally become good at running.  Did my first fartlek at altitude here at Buffalo Park this morning. It was a bitch and a half.

 

Fourth- Now that I’m finally somewhere for a longer period of time, I shall get T SHIRTS UP ON MONDAY FOR SURE 😀

 

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A Sad Day for USA Track and Field. #LetFamRun

22 Jun

On my bike ride this morning I thought up a hilarious post regarding Alan Webb’s recent admission into the 5k at the Olympic Trials.  The original idea for the post was going to be about a bunch of past time all-time greats signing up and getting admitted.

I was going to have funny quips like “Bruce Jenner’s appeal granted, Jenner to compete in Decathlon” and “Billy Mills lacing up for the 10k, is he a darkhorse?”

Image

Can he take on Hardee?

But then shortly after I got home I heard about this Fam bullshit.

 

Now let’s get this out of the way first:  If they denied Fam but also Webb to send the message that rules are rules and standards are standards and you must have them, ok. I could live with that, Fam had ample opportunities to run sub 8:30.

When you let Webb into the 5k, however, you are opening a flood gate, and you must be ready to deal with this in a manner that is fair and treats all the other athletes equally.

 

Is that what USATF did?
Image

 

Now I wonder why this happened… Why Webb got in and Fam didn’t…

Oh I know:

Image

Maybe this picture makes Nike look a little too good..

 

Today, USATF showed that pleasing Nike is more important than pleasing the fans and the athletes. 
Today, track and field in the USA took another step backward.

 

 

This is just a short post, I will be posting throughout the trials with hopefully more pleasant and funny topics. 

How to Creep Out Girls and Embarrass Yourself: A Re-Telling of an Unfortunate Event

19 Jun

Good news, my blog is officially a year old.  I just renewed it today,  over 200,000 views in the first year!!! And I started off getting about 30 views a day for the first month. So thanks for following my incredibly inconsistent posts y’all ❤

Anyway, I got the idea for my blog post today while eating lunch with Ryan Fenton and Alex Lohr.  NAAAAMMEEE DROPPPPP.
They are taking off to Eugene for the Trials soon and Ryan said “Zach, your girl is going to be out there!”.  I was like “Um. What?”.  I was thinking to myself “well, my girlfriend isn’t because she’s in Michigan.  Who is he talking about?”.  Then he told me to think about it for a while.  And then…Ding!  Emma Coburn.  Ryan has never let me live my “blooper” from my junior year down.

If you haven’t seen it, and this is your first time, well…you’re in for a treat.  Honestly I HATE watching this and it’s probably the most embarrassing thing I’ve done besides peeing my pants during a little league game back in 6th or 7th grade (any excuse to let me leave those boring ass games!).

As a preface to watching this, here is some info you should know:

Here is Emma, in case you know nothing about women’s track and field:

She’s good at sports.

and here is me:

I’m too sexy for my retainer, too sexy for my retainer, too sexy to keep both eyes open!

I had talked to Emma once before this, briefly, after the steeple about 2 weeks earlier at the Great Southwest Invitational.  After my race, I was in a kind of happy/dazed state where I just wanted to tell her good job and well, ya know, she’s a blonde and stuff, so I guess I stuck around a little longer than normal.  My dorky self didn’t realize there was a camera that I was standing directly in the frame of.  The rest is history…
(Idk how to embed, just click the link below, tell me if it doesn’t work.  Technology n00b here.)

http://www.flotrack.org/embed/ODc0MTA4MDIw?related=1http://www.flotrack.org/embed/ODc0MTA4MDIw?related=1<p><a href=”http://www.flotrack.org/video/108020-Best-Blooper-of-2008″>Watch more videos on Flotrack</a></p>

Seconds 1:38-1:48
Official tells me that it’s just about time for awards for my race and I should head over there (I won the weakest event at NON).

I never was a good listener.

1:50
I decide I’m gunna stick around and “get some water” first.

There was no turning back after this point.

1:50-2:13
I’m hanging out off camera, not ruining Emma’s interview. Good boy Zach!

WHY COULDN’T YOU JUST STAY THERE, DUDE??

2:14-2:16
WTF ARE YOU DOING ZACH???  This is where it starts. It only gets worse from here on out.

HOPE YA DIDN’T MISS ME WHILE I WAS GONE, BABY

2:30
I’m not sure if that’s steeple water, or ass sweat.  Either way it’s making an appearance in the video.

Yep. Def. Ass sweat

2:35
Dear lord. I’m wiping snot off my face with my elbow.  Somebody come tell me I’m in the way of this interview, please God!

Nah man fuck tissues. I gots elbows.

2:42
Notice how many sips I took of this small water cup.  Wanna know a secret? There wasn’t any water left in there.. Kill me now.

Sippin on some of that air.

2:47
As if I couldn’t do anything more embarrassing than stalk this poor girl and ruin her interview, I scratch my butt.

Yep, that’s the spot!

3:11
I give up, finally, maybe some other time.  One track mind, off to awards now, better hurry!

I’m just gunna pretend I wasn’t awkwardly creeping and go get my award meow

3:16
I start jogging. WHY, NOO WHYYY

3:19
You can hear a loud “bing” type noise.  The noise that is made when a spike collides with an inside rail and a dorky runner falls on his face on the infield.

The Grand…

FINALE.

3:20
Ryan starts laughing, knowing he got this whole thing on tape.

3:22
I walk off in shame as an official comes to try and help me.

It was painful reliving this.  I’d like to think I’m less awkward and dorky by now. Idk my girlfriend  and close friends might tell you otherwise.

But this is the 4 year anniversary, as Flotrack tweeted, of this monumental event in my life.  I think I can finally look back on it and say “wow, haha, what a dork I was! Glad I grew up!”

My sincerest apologies, Emma, if you ever were to read this, for any embarrassment I may have caused you.  Despite my actions in this video I am not a creepy stalker.  Good luck at the trials, we’re all hoping to see you kick some ass!  And maybe, one day, if you’ll forgive me, an interview for this blog would be great!

I have 40 shirts I need to sell and all I need to do is set up the online store.  More info on that in the next post.  Until next time…

Eat. Run. Swag.