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EatRunSwag’s Super Trials Recap!

3 Jul

Quick news on shirts: Last night I submitted my bank info to the google checkout store I setup. It’s going to take up to three days to verify my account, then when I submit tax info the store is ready to go!

Anyway, all of us track junkies just got finished watching the Olympic Trials.  It was WAY more dramatic, exciting, disappointing, and controversial than many of us thought it would be.  Favored athletes failing to qualify, drug cheat agent scandals, the Fam debacle, and the women’s 100m dash amateur hour special (in the words of LR) made for an interesting week, to say the least, in the sport of track and field.

Here is my recap, with a hint of humor, and a dose of honesty.  *WARNING- This post contains foul language, humor, and satire, not recommended for the average stuck up runner douche or women who may be pregnant or nursing.


WOMENS 100m DASH- Tarmoh gives Felix the friendship bracelet she made for her back.



We all wondered what would become of the “dead heat” between the two runners who are (were) also great friends and training partners.  I can’t really hate on Felix because when it comes down to it, track is an individual sport, and if an athlete wants as many chances to get a gold medal, that’s what they train for and live for. But dayum, gurl, I would have let her have that spot. You took 3RD in the US trials, focus on the 200m LIKE EVERY ANALYST AND FORMER GREAT has told you to! That’s a cold move. You better medal in both now babe.


MENS 100m- Justin Gatlin enjoys benefits of drugs to win US title and Olympic Berth

Fuck. You.

While I am not so naive to really think that a lot of the top athletes aren’t on drugs (while I desperately hope they aren’t), I firmly believe that anybody caught should get a LIFETIME BAN.  Seriously, by letting these people return for their “second” chance we’re pretty much saying, “cheat until you get caught. But if you get caught, you’re going to have to sit out until the next Olympics. Then come back and have fun!”  We aren’t providing enough incentive for people NOT to cheat.

Was also sad to see Walter Dix injured 😥


Womens 100m Hurdles-  Lolo Jones pops her London Olympic cherry.

I was going to type something about the race but I forgot while posting that picture. Enjoy



Those who dive…


Surprise 3rd place finisher Jeff Porter was so ecstatic on qualifying that he pretended there was a slip and slide after the finish line. This guy works his butt off, we see him at our track every day and he deserves this after all the hours he has put in. Go get em, and Go Blue.

Also, David Oliver looked TERRIBLE in becoming one of the most surprising athletes not to qualify .


WOMENS 200m DASH- Allyson Felix is way faster than I’ll ever be.

And prettier than I’ll ever be, too


MENS 200m DASH- Wallace Spearmon wins, no surprise there.


Is it racist if I think he looks like Ice T?


WOMENS 400m DASH-  Sanya Richards is scary fast.

I could win this shit with my eyes closed y’all


MENS 400m DASH- Jeremy Wariner isn’t very good at sports anymore, and Bryshon Nellum wins the swagged out comeback award 

50 cent got shot 9 times and made some shitty records. I made an Olympic Team. YOLO.

WOMENS 400m HURDLES- Arizona gal is quite a wildcat

She seems to have some swag


MENS 400m HURDLES- BATMAN doesn’t RETURN, has a DARK NIGHT (I’m too punny)

Pretty much this happened.

WOMENS 800- Geena Gall represents the Wolverines well, Vessey shits the bed.

Wolverine Swag


MENS 800- Jock runs like a high schooler, Duane Solmon makes me tear up, and Nick Symmonds proves that “One Night in Paris” was pretty helpful 

I’m staying in a “Hilton” tonight


WOMENS 1500- Boring. No surprises in this one.

Pretty sure she could beat me up. Blindfolded.


MENS 1500m- Manzano Hooks Em, Robby Andrews runs like a fool, Matt Mr Steal Yo Girl Centro through, Wheating makes second Oly team

Omg he’s so little and adorable


WOMENS 3k STEEPLE- Emma won. I fell behind her once. See two posts before this.

Sorry boys, she’s taken. Also, AWEEEEEEEEEEEE


MENS 3k STEEPLE- My team captain made the final, Jager doesn’t bomb and I like his hair, Cabral continues awesome season.

“Rule #1, no touching of the hair or face”


WOMENS 5K- Sorry I didn’t watch it I was driving to Flagstaff.

MENS 5k-  This race was “Rupp-Certified”, see previous post.

“Suck it Kenyan!”- Rupp


WOMENS 10k- Natosha Rogers proves NCAA title was not a fluke.

Eh hard to cheer for an aggie but I’m a fan.


MENS 10k- NBC brings in a British guy who knows his shit, Rupp makes it look easy, Teg and Ritz are back, and I just choked on a chip while typing this

I thought the starting line was the beginning..?


MENS DECATHLON- Ashton Eaton is really good at sports.  ESPN shows how f-cking stupid they are.

“You only ranked me 10th???”

Sports center ranked him 10th on the top 10. Behind a fan who caught a ball at a game with his hat. I’m not making this shit up.

Also how awkward was the exchange between Bruce Jenner and Dave O’Brien? Damn.


NIKE Proves they own the sport and don’t give a fuck about rules.

Suck it Nike/Hayward Field.

Example 1-  Excellent article by the Brojos on LetsRun. This is sure to ruin your day.

Example 2- They kicked out the Brooks dudes for a silly advertisement

Example 3- Alan Fucking Terrible at Running Webb

Example 4- Fam not let in



Wow that took a lot of time, I’m going to go do something productive now. Hope y’all enjoy this post!

Special Shout-Out to Derek Rubis, the biggest fan in track and field, who I’m sure had a phenomenal time at the trials, you deserve it Derek!




EatRunSwag Interview: Tulsa’s Chris O’Hare, One to Watch this Weekend.

7 Mar

I took a 2 week Hiatus from blogging to focus on my conference meet and to enjoy spring break. In case y’all were wondering, Big 10’s were decent for me. Not quite what I wanted, but a step forward.

On the bring of being "good", but not quite there. A ways to go.

Anyways, here is an interview I did with Tulsa’s Chris O’Hare. If you haven’t heard of him, well you haven’t been paying attention to the mile lists because this dude has been up there for a while now.  This weekend I have a feeling he’ll be one of the favorites for the mile, go get em dude.

It says on your Tulsa bio that your biggest ambition would be to drive a Formula One car, tell me a little more about that:

Formula1 is always just something that my older brother and I have been interested in since we were kids. Everything about F1 is just awesome.

I have no idea what this means. Is this an xbox controller?

So you are not originally from the US, what is your favorite state in the US so far?

As much as I love Tulsa and Oklahoma, I am a huge fan of Austin, Texas. If I was to live anywhere in the U.S. Austin would be the winner.

You, my friend, have very good taste. Best city in the country. Keep Austin Weird!

Favorite Movie?
Close call between The fighter and Warrior

You forgot this one. "Never Back Down, Chris. It's all on you. It always has been."

Favorite Athlete?
I am a big fan of Leo Manzano and Andrew Wheating.

This guy pisses excellence.

Favorite Band?
I like most bands and most kinds of music. Oklahoma has changed me and I now actually quite like country music believe it or not.

The best thing to ever come out of Oklahoma ❤

Running Q’s:

How did you start running?

I started running at school when I wanted to run with my brothers and his friends at their cross country practice but I was too young. My mum spoke to the coach and she let me join in practice and I just had a thing for the longer distances despite being hopeless at sprinting.

It's ok, most of us are hopeless at sprinting. Me especially.

What has been your most memorable running moment so far?
My most memorable running moment was last year when I first broke 4 minutes in the mile. It was great to have my whole team around to celebrate with me.


You’ve had an impressive season thus far and obviously you were a pretty instrumental in Tulsa’s first conference championship. How did it feel to get that win as a team? 

To win the conference Championship was amazing. Having the team win well and truly surpasses the emotions of individual titles. Houston win every year indoor and out so it was something really special to be able to dethrone them with such a small team. When you are missing people in so many events it took a colossal effort on everyones behalf to take that win. Everyone on the team grew a pair and got after it and I have never been more proud to be part of this team.


This weekend is NCAA’s, how do you prepare yourself for a meet like this? (special preparations this week? Tapering? Mentally?)

Preparing for the NCAAs is weird. We try to stay calm and prepare for this just like we prepare for every other race but I can’t help realize the importance of this weekend. I get more and more nervous every day until I actually get to the venue and all my nerves disappear and I am in race mode.
It doesn’t take me too much to get mentally prepared for a race. Once I get into the final quarter of my warm up I am ready to go and nothing can phase me really. I know that with the strength of the big man upstairs I can give everything I have got and if that isn’t enough then I need to go back to training and work harder. With that strength I am not afraid to hurt.

Last year you were a runner-up at the NCAA, which is quite impressive. What are your goals for this year? An NCAA title?
This year I am definitely fitter and stronger and so hopefully I will be able to pull off the national title. After Millrose games I definitely have a renewed sense of determination and fight.

Some pretty manly men in this pic. The manliest of men.

Obviously I’d imagine your main focus is on NCAA right now but do you have any aspirations for this summer’s Olympics?
I am definitely looking forward to this summer as it is such a big year. Hopefully I can get down under the A standard and give myself a good chance of selection.

We hope to see you there bud.

Valentines Weekend Track Re-Cap!!!!11!!1!!

14 Feb

Hey y’all, long time no see.  I didn’t post Friday because I was off actually running a meet of my own out in the middle of nowhere Ohio.  28 second 5k PR for a decent 14:17.  By no means am I “good” yet, but at least maybe I have a little more credibility as a blogger now that I’m not a complete sack of shit on the track.

Anyway, hot damn this was a crazy weekend for track and field.  Here’s my take on what went down:

25 year old Kenyan signs up for Milrose 5k as a high schooler and breaks HS National Record

Even if he is under 20, he's not even within A MINUTE of the Kenyan Junior indoor 5k record.

The Stormin’ Mormon Broke the Collegiate Mile Record

This man may be proof that the mormons may actually be God's chosen ones.

I know I’ve made religion jokes and such before, but I actually have nothing negative to say about this dude. He’s awesome, 3:54 is insane, and maybe he’ll be a big part of the future of American Mid-Distance running.

Which leads me to my next headline..

Alan Webb runs slow.  Again.

In related news, a freshman on my team ran faster than this on Friday and placed 4th. In a meet in the middle of nowhere Ohio.

Matt Mr.-Steal-Yo-Girl Centrowitz once again gives us a reason not to lose faith in American distance running

Hold. My. D^ck.





Just read that headline again.  Dude. Holy shit.  If the race goes out hot at NCAA’s, a 13:30 might not place you in the top 6.

Peter Pan runs Rupp-Certified 2-mile record

There are endless amounts of pics like this online. Thanks google

Rumors are that the pollen count inside the facility was low enough for him to toe the line.
(good job bro, I’m actually impressed with this time ❤ )

-Cam Levins 3:57, this kid has depth.
-Ryan Hill 7:43.  Holy tits.

V-Day post probably coming up tomorrow, and an interview with the one of the top USA jr runners coming soon

If Pro-Runners were Pokemon…

9 Feb

First of all, if you aren’t a nerd/geek and you get sex on the reg, you probably won’t like this post. And I don’t blame you. You can just leave now and come back Friday for an interview with one of the Milrose Mile runners!

But if you have no shame, like yours truly, and at the age of 20 or higher (hopefully not too much higher) you still think Pokemon is the shit, well then indulge in some nostalgic dorkiness below.  You probably won’t get a lot of these jokes without a decent/basic knowledge of Pokemans.

The premise is simple: If some of the most famous runners/running coaches/fans were Pokemon, what Pokemon would they be?

Alan Webb- Slowpoke


No further explanation needed for this one.


Steve Prefontaine- Pikachu

Who makes these freaking pictures..

A super overhyped Pokemon/the most recognizable Pokemon name by non Pokemon fans.  Why overhyped? Well he’s not a bad Pokemon but if I wouldn’t choose him for my Elite Four team.


Will Leer- Alakazam



Derek Rubis- Ditto

Face in Hole totally stole their ideas from Ditto!


Silas Kiplagat- Mudkip

Silas Mudkiplagat


OTC- Team Rocket

The annoying bad guys


Galen Rupp- Meowth

Team Rocket's Mascot


Alberto Salazar- Giovanni

Team Rocket's Manager

Matt Centrowitz- Scyther

THE THROAT SLIT. Also Scyther is cool as fuck


Kara Goucher- Eevee



Marion Jones- Mewtwo

Totally unnatural and lab created.


Dwight Stones- Koffing

Worthless and pollutes our sport when he opens his mouth on air.


Anna (Willard) Pierce- Ninetales

Feisty, Fast, Foxy.

EatRunSwag Interview: Jeremy Rae, Canadian Miler Extraordinaire

4 Feb

Howdy y’all, here I present to you another EatRunSwag interview. This time with my Canadian friend Jeremy Rae.  Fun fact about J-Rae, he was last year’s Mayo Mile champion and will be attempting to defend his title tomorrow afternoon.

Bro'ing out with J-Rae and the Dunbar in Boston

So J-Rae, I know ladies like the foreigners, do you have a lady-friend?

Yes.. yes I do. My girlfriend and I have been dating for over a year.

Bitches love Canada

Who is your NCAA crush?

-No homo, Matt Hughes. If I could grow half as good of a mustache/mullet combo as him I’d be ecstatic.

One of the Manliest of the Men in the sport

What is your favorite movie?

-Gladiator. But the Lord of the Rings trilogy is a very close second.


You’re Canadian, how come you don’t have a flappy head?

-Actually.. I’ve never really gotten into South Park, and that might be why. I’m a way bigger Family Guy fan.


What is your favorite Alanis Morissette song?

-If I had to pick one it’d be “Thank You”.. have you seen the music video? But in all honesty I’m a much bigger Avril fan.

It's like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife

Which do you prefer, miles or kilometers?

-Definitely km’s. It makes my weekly totals seem much higher than they really are.

I still prefers miles. AMERICA.

How did it feel losing to us at the Michigan night game earlier this year?

-3 years in a row of last-minute losses to you guys has been pretty tough to deal with. We play you guys early enough in the year where I still care about how our football team is playing, so it’s been especially difficult.


How did you first get into running?

-I did just about every sport in elementary school and when the track season came around I tried out for the 800m and the shotput. Shockingly, I lost the 800 but was our schools best shotputter.

The youngest pic I could find of you on Facebook

What made you choose to go to Notre Dame?

-I saw a picture of touchdown Jesus and thought that same pose would be a great victory celebration one day. No.. that’s only partially true. I took my visit and really liked the guys on the team. They made me feel really welcome and I could easily see myself fitting in with them.

While it doesn't say anything in the bible about Jesus liking football, he probably did.

You’re the defending champ of the Meyo Mile, describe your victory last year.  Was it your first time under 4 minutes?

-Last year’s race was incredible. The whole week leading up to it everyone had been asking (more like telling me) that I was going to break-4 that weekend. The race played into my hands with a slow 2nd and 3rd lap (1200 split of 3:02-3), and I was able to kick pretty well off that. Getting under four for my first time was a surreal experience, and I was so glad I was able to meet everyones expectations.

I think a "Mayo" mile would be more interesting. 6oz of Mayo per lap

How has your training been going so far this season?

-The build up to this years Meyo mile hasn’t been as great as last year. I got pretty sick in early January and didn’t run at all for a week, and really have only recently gotten over that. Otherwise, I’ve gotten in some good workouts and I’m only getting fitter every week.


What are your goals for this meet, the rest of indoor, and then eventually outdoor?

-The goal is to win again. There’s something about the meet being at home and the mile being the signature event that makes winning the most important thing on Saturday. I’d also like to defend my mile title at Big East, and with the mile craziness that’s already happened (McCarthy and McEntee) I’m already getting excited about that race. Otherwise, we’ll have another good DMR this year and we’d like to at least match our 4th place finish from last year at nationals.

The Ragin' Canadian vs. The Stormin' Mormon

Are you looking at going to the Canadian Olympic Trials?

-I haven’t thought much about outdoors yet, seeing as it’s so early in the year. However, I was embarrassed with my 9th place finish at NCAA’s last year, and so placing higher will for sure be one of my main goals. And I definitely plan on running the trials too, but NCAA’s is always the main focus.

Hoping to see you rep the Maple Leaf this summer, dude.

EatRunSwag T-Shirts! COMING SOON!

31 Jan

Hey y’all, so I finally got around to designing some t-shirts and I ordered one to test out the shirt company.

It came in today:

Don't know what's sexier, the shirt or the man wearing it.


So here are some potential designs:

Haters Gon' Hate- Wolverine Colors


Plenty of diff. color options I can play around for this shirt. Gimme feedback!




On the back it says ""


It will be another week or two before I can order the shirts in bulk because it’s going to cost a few hundred dollars of my own money.  I need to make sure there’s going to be enough demand that I don’t lose a lot of money on this.  It’s looking like they will cost between $15-20 right now. If you were to go to the site yourself and order one tee it’d be $22 PLUS shipping.  In the future I will have bumper stickers and diff t-shirt material options such as dri-fit and maybe some nike/adidas!  But for now, it’s on a cotton tee. Feels as comfy as any other cotton tee, I’ve already worn it and  I will let you know how it holds up with washing before I sell some.


Help me pay rent, buy some shirts when they come out ❤


Give me some feedback and suggestions on color-ways you’d prefer ❤

#Shit Runners Don’t Say

20 Jan

First off, I’ve added a “Stop Censorship” Anti-SOPA banner to my blog, cuz that shit is whack.

Secondly, I’m rushing this post before going off to a date with my lovely girlfriend (swag).  But inspired by my Sh*t Runners Say post and the youtube video “Shit Nobody Says”

, here is my rendition of Shit Runners Don’t Say


“I love watching race-walking”

Still more interesting than the WNBA.


“I’m glad I drank 2 4 lokos last night!” (*this only applies to the offseason/runners who drink in season (a.k.a. not me))

post loko 20miler? Not happening.


“Go with the Rivals”

Old Dyestat joke, some of you will get it.

“I love doing triples!” (Dual meet 4×800, mile, 2mile)



Stress fractures are the best!

Everybody knows at least one girl who has gone clubbing in "The Boot"


Man, runners have such big boobs!

Lol, false.


“I can’t believe I ate that (insert junk food treat), I feel so guilty :(” (*applies to guys only)



“Man the coverage of the track meet on TV was great!”

Track On TV <<<<< Track IRL