Tag Archives: Prefontaine

If Pro-Runners were Pokemon…

9 Feb

First of all, if you aren’t a nerd/geek and you get sex on the reg, you probably won’t like this post. And I don’t blame you. You can just leave now and come back Friday for an interview with one of the Milrose Mile runners!

But if you have no shame, like yours truly, and at the age of 20 or higher (hopefully not too much higher) you still think Pokemon is the shit, well then indulge in some nostalgic dorkiness below.  You probably won’t get a lot of these jokes without a decent/basic knowledge of Pokemans.

The premise is simple: If some of the most famous runners/running coaches/fans were Pokemon, what Pokemon would they be?

Alan Webb- Slowpoke

1:59.43.

No further explanation needed for this one.

 

Steve Prefontaine- Pikachu

Who makes these freaking pictures..

A super overhyped Pokemon/the most recognizable Pokemon name by non Pokemon fans.  Why overhyped? Well he’s not a bad Pokemon but if I wouldn’t choose him for my Elite Four team.

 

Will Leer- Alakazam

THE STACHE

 

Derek Rubis- Ditto

Face in Hole totally stole their ideas from Ditto!

 

Silas Kiplagat- Mudkip

Silas Mudkiplagat

 

OTC- Team Rocket

The annoying bad guys

 

Galen Rupp- Meowth

Team Rocket's Mascot

 

Alberto Salazar- Giovanni

Team Rocket's Manager

Matt Centrowitz- Scyther

THE THROAT SLIT. Also Scyther is cool as fuck

 

Kara Goucher- Eevee

FREAKING ADORABLE

 

Marion Jones- Mewtwo

Totally unnatural and lab created.

 

Dwight Stones- Koffing

Worthless and pollutes our sport when he opens his mouth on air.

 

Anna (Willard) Pierce- Ninetales

Feisty, Fast, Foxy.

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Happy Bday, Pre.

25 Jan

I’ve  missed two posts, not from laziness, but from getting done with practice after 8pm. I don’t make posts after 8 because they get much less traffic. Sorry d00dz.

First off, help some of my friends out and vote for them in the New Balance spike contest on fbook!

http://www.facebook.com/newbalancenationals?sk=app_284267094962348

Go to “Gallery”, search “Temi” and vote for his spike. It’s red white and blue, so if you don’t like it then you’re a terrorist.

 

Anyway, it’s Pre’s bday y’all!

Happy B-day Bronie

Obviously Pre is one of the most over-marketed  well known runners of all time.  I’m not sure there has ever been a high school meet without at least one scrawny white kid wearing a t-shirt with Pre’s mug on it.

Pretty sure I owned this shirt once.. We all have, we all have.

With all this hype, should we really idolize him like Nike has been telling us to do for years?

Maybe not idolize, but respect? Yes.

WHY?

THE ‘STACHE

DEAR GOD IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL

His ‘stache makes me feel like an inferior man.  I’ve never had one long enough to comb and trim 😦

Ladies Man.

Front page of Sports Illustrated. Bitches love the front page of Sports Illustrated.

According to accounts from his friends and from the 2 or 3 movies about him, Pre got “mad tail” and what not.  Not common for a national class distance runner these days.

He said cool stuff.

PREACH.

Minus that whole “Suicide Pace” BS, Pre spoke like the Muhammad Ali of the track world.

He was “alright” at running.

"Where'd y'all go?"

He was ok I guess.

Pre was more famous than any distance runner any of us young folk have seen in our lives. People who played REAL SPORTS actually admired this dude.  Ask any of your footballer friends to name one distance runner and they probably respond with “Pre”.  If we had more national class runners with his swagger, mustache,  and stupid racing tactics ballsy racing performances, maybe more people would watch our sport.

Unfortunately, Pre was not as good at drunk driving as he was at running.  So that’ll forever tarnish his reputation.

"Do a barrel roll!"

He’ll forever be known for dying in a drunk driving accident.  But hey, that’s way better than dying in shame from not stopping little boys from getting molested.

Its not funny because it's true.

Shirt Design Pics to come on Friday!!

Sh*t Runners Say

10 Jan

Credit for the inspiration goes to Twitter follower Cara Hawkins who tweeted “Has nobody done a #shitrunnerssay yet?”.  First, check out her blog @ http://www.runningshoegeek.com/ there’s some good stuff on there and I like her pre-race preview of the Marathon Trials.

Ok well if you’ve read “Sh*t My Dad Says” or any of the trending topics which go #shitmy(insert noun here)says then this’ll seem familiar.  Here’s the EatRunSwag take on it!

This post is slightly offensive, you’ve been warned.

 

I’VE GOT A SUCH A RUNNERS HIGH RIGHT NOW!

Not as good as a Swimmers High

 

WHAT WOULD PRE DO???

Probably This.

 

MOST SPORTS REQUIRE ONE BALL, OURS TAKES TWO.

This guy definitely has a big pair.

HAVE YOU READ BORN TO RUN? I’M DEF GETTIN SOME VIBRAMS!

A Cowboys Fan wearing Vibrams...it figures..

 

ONLY 90 MILES THIS WEEK!

Or in Cam's case, "Only 130 miles this week!"

KARA GOUCHER IS SO HOTT

This one I agree with.

 

WILL _(ELITE HIGH SCHOOL RUNNER)__ BREAK FOUR IN THE MILE THIS YEAR?

Well, I guess the answer to that question last year was yes.

 

WHY DONT GIRLS LIKE US??

This. This is why.

 

 

More installments of this to come in the future. Please feel free to send me messages on facebook if you have suggestions!